Observations
Alot has happened in the last month, I don't even know where to start. We had a huge mission, but in all reality we were the bitchmaids and didn't get to participate in the offensive assault part; we played the outer security-freeze-balls-off-and-do-nothing-while-you-watch-other-soldiers-air-assault-into-combat role.
Other than that huge mission that the news glorified but we really in important terms had no part in, life is decent.
I've come to pretty much adopt the arabic word Insh'allah. I use it when things don't really go the way we expect, like stupid army shit happening? Insh'allah. The word itself is deeply rooted within the Muslim religion, I suppose it's translation loosely means the will of god, or god's will. From what I've read, in Arabic culture, the word itself is used in 3 ways. In Iraq, from what I've gathered and understood, they use it as a form of hope, like hopefully none of my men in my company will get hurt, Insh'allah. Or when things go wrong, Inshallah...God's Will. The third is the the most unique to me. In Iraqi culture, and maybe even the rest of the Arab world, saying no is regarded as rude, so instead so saying no, they say insh'allah. In essence, if it happens it happens, if not, then not. Insh'allah.
We've finally settled in and started getting used to a somewhat manageable rotation of Guard and Patrols. I hate being on Guard. Most of the time I'm on the roof by myself watching the rear of the Patrol Base, which is how I like it, because during the day the IA guys hang out up there and at night I get to walk around rather than stay in the turret like I would if I were in other guard spots. We do four hour shifts and at times it can be mindnumbing. I'm not gonna lie, there are certain things I do on guard that I'm not supposed to do, but I do it to stay awake. During the day it's interesting to watch our Local Iraqi neighbors go about their everyday lives, oblivious to the fact that I'm standing on the roof gazing at them through my binoculars with child like interest, wondering the most random things about them.
Life here is starting to get lonely. It sucks going through your second deployment alone, without a signifcant other, someone you can confide in and know that they care, someone who, you know is probably missing you and thinking about you right now.
One thing that constantly blows my mind even though I know it happens all the time is the amount of pending divorces in my unit. So-fucking-many. One of my guys check out his wife's myspace only to find a picture of her and another man together as a profile picture, one other guy's wife is moving to colorado all of a sudden and took all the money, funny thing though, is that he's only pissed off because she's taking the dog too. It sickens me the fucking weak willed women, abandoning their husbands because they're, like they're the only ones? It's bullshit. That's why however long I'm in the Army, I will refure to be married. I won't be the one who says "It'll never happen to me" and then see my wife ruin me. I'd never recover.
Living in such cramped areas and seeing the same fucking faces day in and day out is starting to agitate me as well. The little things are starting to pile on and eventually I'm gonna just blow up. My only solace and respite from going insane is a book I recently bought about backpacking and traveling the world. It's a book called Half-time by Steve Devereaux and its my wonderful escape from this place.
I initially intended on saving most of my money from this deployment, but now, no more. My mom needs help with bills and such, and it really pisses me off. I mean, not pisses me off, but it just sucks not being able to have an income to for when I get back. To be able to say I live comfortably instead of the paycheck to paycheck lifestyle that I've lived on ever since coming back from Iraq the first time would've been nice. But she needs help, and there's no way in hell that I won't help my mom when she needs it. She's done so much for me that I feel like an utter schmuck when I think about the way I've behaved in the last 10 years or the dumbfuck ignorant things I've said to her or thought about her. I wish I could go back in time and redo the way my mom and I have gotten along. Oh well, Insh'allah.
I'm really interested in Islam, I mean, I'm not a religious person at all. I'm a firm believer of karma, but religion in general is just an interesting subject, especially Islam. It's very unfortunate that most Americans are too lazy or too scared to learn about the truth of Muslim people and learn about their culture and their history, rather than be bullied around into being scared of it. In the time that I've been here I've gotten to know our Iraqi Army Soldiers, they live with us here at our PB, eat with us, sleep with us, patrol with us, smoke with us, and joke with us. They are some of the kindest, most genuine people I've ever met. They are a true representation of the Average Iraqi and true muslims.
I've started getting care packages from people again and feel like shit that I haven't responded to them with a thank you email, but it's like one of those things that you wanna do but you never get around to, where you say I'll do it today, but by the time you remember it, it's too late. Take that example and pretty much repeat it everyday.
Oh, speaking of packages, I was a witness to an amazingly unbelieveable event today. I don't know yet whether to be appalled/bewildered? or be gracious/thankful.
I was on guard today when word came over the net that we had to secure the LZ for 2 blackhawks to lands. This kind of stuff is typical, about once a week. Usually it's someone coming in to check up on things or whatever random reason.
Today however, I noticed that when the birds touched down, the only things I saw offloaded were boxes and packages. I wondered to myself what they were? Highly Sensitive Items I bet, who knows.
So I get off of guard and go downstairs, not really thinking about the boxes, when I see the boxes. I stood there, looking at them, thinking "No, those can't be what the birds dropped off." So I asked, and sure enough, they were.
The boxes that the Army deemed fit to send via Blackhawk Helicopters to us were care packages. Oh no, but these weren't "normal" care packages, these were not the typical care packages that thousands of Americans send to soldiers, not the same packages that get transported to us via convoy whenever we stop at the main base. Oh no. These were SPECIAL packages. These care packages that the Army spent thousands of dollars in fuel as well as putting multi-million dollar helicopters at risk of attack and not to mention risking the lives of soldiers by securing the LZ itself were special because the care packages were sent to a high ranking General. Somehow, someone way up in the food chain thought it wise to blackhawk packages to us that were sent directly to the General. Now I understand the idea of it maybe boosting morale, the oh cool factor, but seriously, do you realize that you put the lives of my men at risk for some cans of chunky soup and baby wipes and sardines? SARDINES!?!?!? who the hell eats those things?? like 1 out of 20 people like sardines!!! Do they not realize that not even a year ago the same PB we live in now took routine small arms fire and even an RPG attack that killed an interpreter? That if something had happened and one of my brothers died, it'd be not in the heat of battle that my brother gave his life for his country, but for a can of FUCKING Sardines!!
*Sigh... Insh'allah
See what I mean now when I use my new multi-purpose favorite word?
Other than that huge mission that the news glorified but we really in important terms had no part in, life is decent.
I've come to pretty much adopt the arabic word Insh'allah. I use it when things don't really go the way we expect, like stupid army shit happening? Insh'allah. The word itself is deeply rooted within the Muslim religion, I suppose it's translation loosely means the will of god, or god's will. From what I've read, in Arabic culture, the word itself is used in 3 ways. In Iraq, from what I've gathered and understood, they use it as a form of hope, like hopefully none of my men in my company will get hurt, Insh'allah. Or when things go wrong, Inshallah...God's Will. The third is the the most unique to me. In Iraqi culture, and maybe even the rest of the Arab world, saying no is regarded as rude, so instead so saying no, they say insh'allah. In essence, if it happens it happens, if not, then not. Insh'allah.
We've finally settled in and started getting used to a somewhat manageable rotation of Guard and Patrols. I hate being on Guard. Most of the time I'm on the roof by myself watching the rear of the Patrol Base, which is how I like it, because during the day the IA guys hang out up there and at night I get to walk around rather than stay in the turret like I would if I were in other guard spots. We do four hour shifts and at times it can be mindnumbing. I'm not gonna lie, there are certain things I do on guard that I'm not supposed to do, but I do it to stay awake. During the day it's interesting to watch our Local Iraqi neighbors go about their everyday lives, oblivious to the fact that I'm standing on the roof gazing at them through my binoculars with child like interest, wondering the most random things about them.
Life here is starting to get lonely. It sucks going through your second deployment alone, without a signifcant other, someone you can confide in and know that they care, someone who, you know is probably missing you and thinking about you right now.
One thing that constantly blows my mind even though I know it happens all the time is the amount of pending divorces in my unit. So-fucking-many. One of my guys check out his wife's myspace only to find a picture of her and another man together as a profile picture, one other guy's wife is moving to colorado all of a sudden and took all the money, funny thing though, is that he's only pissed off because she's taking the dog too. It sickens me the fucking weak willed women, abandoning their husbands because they're, like they're the only ones? It's bullshit. That's why however long I'm in the Army, I will refure to be married. I won't be the one who says "It'll never happen to me" and then see my wife ruin me. I'd never recover.
Living in such cramped areas and seeing the same fucking faces day in and day out is starting to agitate me as well. The little things are starting to pile on and eventually I'm gonna just blow up. My only solace and respite from going insane is a book I recently bought about backpacking and traveling the world. It's a book called Half-time by Steve Devereaux and its my wonderful escape from this place.
I initially intended on saving most of my money from this deployment, but now, no more. My mom needs help with bills and such, and it really pisses me off. I mean, not pisses me off, but it just sucks not being able to have an income to for when I get back. To be able to say I live comfortably instead of the paycheck to paycheck lifestyle that I've lived on ever since coming back from Iraq the first time would've been nice. But she needs help, and there's no way in hell that I won't help my mom when she needs it. She's done so much for me that I feel like an utter schmuck when I think about the way I've behaved in the last 10 years or the dumbfuck ignorant things I've said to her or thought about her. I wish I could go back in time and redo the way my mom and I have gotten along. Oh well, Insh'allah.
I'm really interested in Islam, I mean, I'm not a religious person at all. I'm a firm believer of karma, but religion in general is just an interesting subject, especially Islam. It's very unfortunate that most Americans are too lazy or too scared to learn about the truth of Muslim people and learn about their culture and their history, rather than be bullied around into being scared of it. In the time that I've been here I've gotten to know our Iraqi Army Soldiers, they live with us here at our PB, eat with us, sleep with us, patrol with us, smoke with us, and joke with us. They are some of the kindest, most genuine people I've ever met. They are a true representation of the Average Iraqi and true muslims.
I've started getting care packages from people again and feel like shit that I haven't responded to them with a thank you email, but it's like one of those things that you wanna do but you never get around to, where you say I'll do it today, but by the time you remember it, it's too late. Take that example and pretty much repeat it everyday.
Oh, speaking of packages, I was a witness to an amazingly unbelieveable event today. I don't know yet whether to be appalled/bewildered? or be gracious/thankful.
I was on guard today when word came over the net that we had to secure the LZ for 2 blackhawks to lands. This kind of stuff is typical, about once a week. Usually it's someone coming in to check up on things or whatever random reason.
Today however, I noticed that when the birds touched down, the only things I saw offloaded were boxes and packages. I wondered to myself what they were? Highly Sensitive Items I bet, who knows.
So I get off of guard and go downstairs, not really thinking about the boxes, when I see the boxes. I stood there, looking at them, thinking "No, those can't be what the birds dropped off." So I asked, and sure enough, they were.
The boxes that the Army deemed fit to send via Blackhawk Helicopters to us were care packages. Oh no, but these weren't "normal" care packages, these were not the typical care packages that thousands of Americans send to soldiers, not the same packages that get transported to us via convoy whenever we stop at the main base. Oh no. These were SPECIAL packages. These care packages that the Army spent thousands of dollars in fuel as well as putting multi-million dollar helicopters at risk of attack and not to mention risking the lives of soldiers by securing the LZ itself were special because the care packages were sent to a high ranking General. Somehow, someone way up in the food chain thought it wise to blackhawk packages to us that were sent directly to the General. Now I understand the idea of it maybe boosting morale, the oh cool factor, but seriously, do you realize that you put the lives of my men at risk for some cans of chunky soup and baby wipes and sardines? SARDINES!?!?!? who the hell eats those things?? like 1 out of 20 people like sardines!!! Do they not realize that not even a year ago the same PB we live in now took routine small arms fire and even an RPG attack that killed an interpreter? That if something had happened and one of my brothers died, it'd be not in the heat of battle that my brother gave his life for his country, but for a can of FUCKING Sardines!!
*Sigh... Insh'allah
See what I mean now when I use my new multi-purpose favorite word?
posted by PurelyFiction at 10:06 AM
2 Comments:
be a man and write a thank you as soon as a package for you arrives. it will take 5 minutes
you will get more packages and make somebody happy at home
hello carl,
landed on your blog quite by chance. i am your average non-arabic muslim. your usage of inshallah is quite effective :)
you are right these words that punctuate the muslim's speech do reflect a mindset. i think i can make their usage a bit more precise for you.
inshallah means 'if god wills'. it reflects the muslim belief that one's responsibility is to strive. the ultimate success or failure of our endeavor is in god's hands. thus any time we make a commitment for the future, express a desire, dream, etc. we say inshallah. i will meet you for tea tomorrow, inshallah (if god wills). inshallah, i hope to become a scientist when i grow up. the use of inshallah as a polite 'no' is common, but at least i regard it as a poor use of the word.
'masha allah' means 'whatever god grants'. it expresses contentment with god's will. it is used both when things go your favorably and otherwise since the believer always submits to god's will. hence i think the second instance of insha allah in your blog post should in fact be masha allah.
'alhamdu lillah' mean 'all praises are due to allah'. it is the customary expression when one sneezes. again, this expression is very commonly used. it is one of the standard replies to the question 'how are you?'. 'i am well, alhamdu lillah (allah praises are due to allah)'. we use this expression when we witness good or experience success. it is an expression of humility; all good and success is from allah and thus he is the rightful owner of all praise.
'subhan allah' means 'glory belongs to god'. it is an expression used when we are awestruck by some natural wonder. a beautiful person, breathtaking waterfall, etc. we also say 'subhan allah' when see something bad associated with god. for example the christians say that god has a son to which we say 'subhan allah' meaning (far removed is god from that which you ascribe to him).
there are several other very commonly used expressions like 'allahu akbar', 'jazak allah', 'la hawla wa la quwata illah billah' but i am going to pass on them for now.
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